Copyright © Anna Nolan, 2020
Unless you are in a pair,
It’s a rather sad affair:
All these hearts and fluffy stuff
Make today’s occasion tough;
It’s a fest of coupledom,
Glorified on Love.com;
But reflect on it a tad,
It is really not that bad;
First, there is a perk of note:
A control of one’s remote,
Which is sole and absolute;
You may wish to switch to mute,
You may channel-surf at will,
You may gorge on sport and chill,
Watch a thriller or a weepie
Or delight in something creepy.
You may also, on a whim,
Fly to Tonga for a swim,
Go skydiving in Dubai
With no need for a goodbye,
Or hang gliding in Japan
Without flouting any ban;
You may even, if you wish,
Dedicate yourself to fish.
You could dye your hair bright-red
Or play solitaire in bed,
Relocate to the Bahamas
Or – just veg in your pyjamas.
Trust me, you will do just fine
Sans a special Valentine,
And, besides, there’s every chance
Of tomorrow’s hot romance.
Then you’ll really have a blast,
But, when several years have passed,
Some of you may feel undone,
Musing, freedom was quite fun!
Copyright © Anna Nolan, 2019
Christmas is approaching, so
Our mode is go, go, go!
We must buy a lot of stuff
To ensure we have enough
Of the lovely festive fare
That imbues our feast with flair.
First, we have to make a list
To make sure that nothing’s missed.
Nothing must be left to chance,
So we’re in a Yuletide trance
Mobilising our grey matter:
Number one is shellfish platter,
Then comes lobster (must be dressed) –
Thermidor’s by far the best –
We will serve it with cheese crust
(Adding brandy is a must).
Crab and avocado spheres
Always raise the wildest cheers,
And we will, without a fluster,
Purchase salmon with gold lustre;
As for tasty Christmas snacks,
You can’t beat ricotta stacks,
Chocolate bark, pork sausage rolls,
Christmas crack and brandy balls.
Now come mains: we’ll get the bird –
Fifty-pounder is preferred;
If we source a smaller one,
We will still not be outdone
‘Cos we’ll also buy a goose
(Serving it with pumpkin mousse);
Better still: a three-bird roast
Will upstage (yay!) every host,
Which is why we’ll source a duck,
Common Pochard (with some luck);
We might also get a grouse:
There’s no scrimping in our house!
Then there’s meats: a wild boar joint
Always, always makes a point,
Venison does go down well
With our type of clientele,
So does veal and British beef
(Roast the latter with bay leaf);
For our Fred, it’s Herdwick lamb;
We must also get some ham.
So as not to face rebuffing,
We’ll make sage & onion stuffing
And avoid a frightful tarnish
Having twenty types of garnish.
Now come sweets: our Christmas pud
Always puts us in the mood,
So does panna cotta jelly
(It was even on the telly).
Our festive stollen slices
Will be filled with various spices,
While our passion fruit dessert
Won’t have equals, we assert.
As for Christmas Rainbow Cake,
It’s not all that hard to make,
Nor are port-and-rum mice pies:
Baking ninety would be wise.
One would have to be a nutter
Not to relish brandy butter:
Extra-thick, it’s always yummy,
Satisfying every tummy,
Whereas brandy pouring cream
Is a treat that is supreme;
Twenty pints might just suffice:
To run out would not be nice.
It is more than just a hunch:
We’ll require Christmas punch,
Eggnog, sangria, party fizz
(They help oil our Christmas quiz);
Krug champagne is always cool:
We must source it for this Yule,
Also gin, port, rum and whisky
(Though they make our Fred quite frisky).
It is hoped that, come what may,
This will last till Boxing Day.
What is more, we’ve had a ball
With a treat to top them all,
Which did whet our appetite.
What was it? A plebiscite!
Yes, we’ve had, dear girls and boys,
An election – joy of joys!
Copyright © Anna Nolan, 2019
Most important of your missions?
Cutting CO2 emissions;
Your ideals are exalted:
Global warming must be halted.
Therefore, in your eco war,
You will fly to Singapore
For a summit aiming to
Figure out just what to do.
Boeing really is the best:
It has wings and all the rest
And will, in no time at all,
Fly you anywhere long haul.
Are not what, quite frankly, daunts
Eco warriors of your kind,
With grave matters on their mind.)
On return (you’ve just touched down),
There are rallies round your town,
So you jump into your car;
Walk a mile? That’s way too far!
Then there’s* sit-ins, so that you
Can affix yourself with glue
To the pavement – with the call:
“Save the Planet, one and all!”
Thus you toil, without a break,
So you do deserve a steak,
Thick and juicy – just the thing:
All this iron boosts your zing.
You do feel some guilt (a smidge)
Looking at your walk-in fridge;
You would ditch it if you could,
But it serves a greater good.
As for your wood-burner – it
Looks so cosy when it’s lit,
So you settle with your plate,
Quite contented, feeling great,
For, with pride within your heart,
You believe you’ve played a part
In (though this might seem quite strange)
Just averting climate change.
*Well, it should be there are, of course, but if the lovely natives freely indulge in the likes of there’s us, so can an alien – particularly on the grounds of poetic scanning (though poetic may be stretching it a tad in verses such as this).
Copyright © Anna Nolan, 2019
Snowdrops, delicate and pale,
Carpet the entire vale
As the winter, now apace,
Loosens its robust embrace.
Milder weather drawing near,
Crocuses will soon appear –
Purple, lilac, orange, white,
They are an enchanting sight;
And when daffs erupt, we’ll all
Watch their gleeful dance – in thrall;
May means bluebells, and their hue,
Often called electric blue,
Will entrance you, make you swoon
As they drape their fine festoon
Right across sun-dappled glades,
Where they vie with verdant blades.
Later, summer blooms galore
Will delight you even more,
Their sweet scent (beyond compare)
Wafting gently in the air.
All this riot, day by day,
Simply takes one’s breath away;
It’s a wildly joyous fest:
Mother Nature at her best!