I have now started writing political satire (in verse) inspired by Brexit. To those reading this outside Britain, this country has voted (albeit narrowly) in favour of leaving the European Union. This has provoked much controversy and created deep divisions between the supporters and opponents of Britain’s membership of the Union. I believe that one of the reasons behind the vote to leave was the desire to curb immigration. Since I hail from Poland, and am thus one of those immigrants whom many (though, of course, not all) Brits seem to dislike, I am getting my own back by satirising Brexit in verse. Enjoy!
With this country set for Brexit,
Please don’t show me to the exit
‘Cos, some misdeeds* notwithstanding,
I could pass for quite upstanding
(Although not when in repose
After vodka overdose,
But I know that it is sinful
Having what they call a skinful):
I will not condone a fiddle
And sit roughly in the middle
On the scale from saints to sinners;
I eat carrots with my dinners,
Take crushed garlic, go for walkies,
Have foresworn soft-centre choccies,
And I’m also (fancy this!)
Upping my Omega 3s**.
I did pay my taxes – once***
And have grabbed at every chance
To perform a kindly deed
When I spied a soul in need;
Have you ever even tried
To become a helpful guide
To a dear old lady who
Looked confused and lost to you?
I’d be in there like a shot,
Never mind how hard she fought …
But there are (I’m shy, don’t clap)
More fine feathers in my cap:
I have never been a chancer,
Smuggler, banker, spy, pole dancer
(Although I’m a dancing Pole),
I have tended to my soul
And renounced the deadly sins****,
And I’ve used recycle bins,
Plus, I never did striptease …
Can I stay then? Pretty please!
* We shall not dwell on those, though
**The lovely natives routinely place the apostrophe before the ‘s’, where it’s redundant because ‘3s’ is a regular plural; we may be aliens, but we have studied English grammar – in depth
***Or twice
****Well, at least three of them
You sound like a virtuous citizen to me 😉 especially since you eat your carrots. It is great you have a great sense of humor about this sad situation.
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Thanks, Deborah; that’s exactly the kind of response I was hoping for. Yes, I have been blessed with a sense of humour and intend to deploy it to the full in satirising Brexit. Again, best wishes for 2018 xxx
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Keep up the good work. xo
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xxx
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Lovely rhymes! What fun!!
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Thank you so much, Diana; with your immense grief to contend with, it’s very generous of you to read, and react to, stuff like this. Unlike you – an incredibly talented writer and poet – I am merely a satirist, but, boy, am I having fun satirising Brexit in comic verse! I have only just started, but I certainly don’t intend to stop. xxx
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My very dear Anna It’s good to hear from you Especially as you’ve started On doing something new. I love to read your poems And your little rhymes It reminds my of my time in Keswick, It seems a long long time. I still have the rhymes you gave me, I keep them in a book You were a much better writer Than trying to be a cook. A domestic goddess you may not be but I’m glad that you came here It’s the only time I think nowadays Good english I can hear. Your reference to a Pole pole dancer It really made me smile It put a picture in my mind, I think I’ll keep it for a while.
All my love and best wishes to you and Vincent David
Sent from my iPad
>
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Ha, ha, ha, David, I ADORE your sense of humour; yep, a domestic goddess I certainly ain’t (poor Vinnie)! But I am having tremendous fun writing humorous verses for a book celebrating our vintage age (I hope to publish it next year). Thank you so much for commenting.
Warmest wishes and love from me and Vincent Anthony (I don’t know any Vincent Davids – mine’s Vincent Anthony; sorry, I just couldn’t help myself – “Vincent David” looks so funny!) xxx
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