Our local newspaper, which I mentioned in the previous rant, has recently regaled its readers with this riveting piece of reportage.

Fellow hero Ryan Forsyth, 19, led his sleeping mother and brother out of their blazing home late at night after it was engulfed in flames.

At the time, we all rejoiced in the family’s miraculous escape and commiserated over their being made homeless on Christmas Eve. With so much to have had to contend with since then, what they certainly don’t need now is being labelled somnambulist by some journalist whose brain’s left hemisphere seems to have been adversely affected by the heatwave. What the hack was undoubtedly trying to say is this.

Fellow hero Ryan Forsyth, 19, led his mother and brother, both still half-asleep, out of their blazing home late at night after it was engulfed in flames.

Though an inveterate editor, I am painfully aware that there is often a better way of dealing with such stuff than the one I’m suggesting. How would you restore logic in this sentence? Barely awake, hardly awake, barely roused, only just roused? I’d love to see your suggestions!